1) Man goes into bookshop to enquire about a new book launch....."Do you have the new, ehm ,sorry cant remember the name, book with helpful hints for men who have incredibly small penises please?"

Bookshop assistant looks down at list and says.." I`m sorry, but it doesnt seem to be in yet"

"Yes, thats the one " he replies!!!

if that doesnt make u groan then here`s number 2...

2) A women (who had obviously been subject to a beating with the ugly-stick) said to a man in the post-office.."Please excuse me but can i borrow your biro to sign my cheque,I`m afraid I have lost my pen "

He replied "well you`d better try and find it quick or the farmer will get cross!"

Sorry chaps.